Oh, that's sweet. You're mine too. Now I have to run and read the Rikki Ducornet story right away. I bet I could kick her ass in Boggle!

Leela, matchy-matchy can be very charming. My 100 year old grandmother's guest bedroom has matching bedspreads, curtains, and an upholstered chair. It's so...unified, and creepy. Matchy matchy-ness can impart a strange, old-timey feeling to a room, a feeling of trying too hard, obsessiveness, and excessive femininity. Consider the possibility that this is a good thing. You could also make a dress to match.

Sweet and sour kumquats with jasmine rice.

Yes. Yes. I don't know. Yes.

Hi Lukey G. Thanks so much for your kind words. It can be really difficult to say where a story comes from (or embarrassing), but I do know that "The Long Hall" sprang out of a sad feeling I had on a trip to Colorado where I saw a lot of dying trees, victims of the ongoing bark beetle infestation of the west. It was a self-indulgent sad feeling--or maybe a flashback--about how I used to think about boys when I was younger. With longing and dread, I guess. Then the trees and the boys joined up and became the idea for the story. Along with sadness. Isn't that a girly answer? Feelings, Lukey. It came from feelings.

As for your friend, the trick to surviving three or more movies a week without having a breakdown is to avoid romantic comedies.

Oh Rita, I'm so glad you asked. Alliteration and internal rhyme is always fun in a fake name, as is weirdness. Have you visited the random name generator? I love it. There's a link to it on the "stories" page of this website, and plenty of the names that pop up have no gender affiliation. Here's one I have written down: Preston Oelke. This one's girly but great: Carmella Mazella.

Yes, I like mideastern food.

Sean, what's the point of your question? Are you asking me for help with your homework? Just scroll down a little, or search for the word "mike." I don't mind helping you but you're only going to get a sarcastic answer if your question remains as vague as what's the point of the story.

Sean, oh Sean, it's sad. There was a whole series of questions and answers about that story that got eaten by the website. But look down below and you will see a question from Mike that's much like yours. The point of the story is to make you happy and nervous. Yes, it is a fairy tale.

Hi Alex. That's great, though having papers written about my stories seems surreal to me, odd and sort of overblown, like archaeologists going through my luggage. But pleasing. I'm glad to hear the paper drove you crazy. Good luck with that stereo.

Hi Elizabeth. I don't have much control over the image on the cover...I think I have something in my contract referred to as "input," which means that if I really hate what they come up with, they'll probably change it.

As it happens, I did hate what they came up with initially for My Date With Satan--I think it was roses, a sort of feminine hygiene-like blur of roses. But when the designer found the Jello mold with the jewels in it, I was thrilled. I'm glad you like it too.